Calling All Angels

 

“Our highest insights must – and should – sound like follies and sometimes like crimes when they are heard without permission by those who are not predisposed and predestined for them.” F. Nietzsche

My grandmother quoted Nietzsche in her book of memoirs that she wrote for us, her Schaufelberger family, back in the 1990's.  I wonder, did she know and love Nietzsche, his philosophy, his soul? Or perhaps she had learned a few of his most famous quotes when she was in grade school, in that little white one room schoolhouse where she graduated the 8th grade to go out evermore into the big wild world equipped to make her way as a strong, moral woman? Or was it a mere happenstance that she stumbled across a quote of his that touched her heart, so she included it in her book to guide and inspire us, her ancestors, for decades, as it inspired her for a moment?

I was a grown woman when I really fell in love with Nietzsche. Perhaps I had experienced some familiarity with him in those early 1990's years, loving and understanding only as much as a young, naive, twenty-something girl can.  Filled with unlimited dreams and ambitions, I was set on writing my own world into existence. Philosophy and advice was nice, but secondary, or perhaps tertiary, or lesser.  

He re-entered my world in the mid 2000's when a divorce and unfulfilled dreams and visions sent me seeking something more...something higher, deeper.  I longed to feel more alive.  I longed to fly, but Nietzsche could only take me as far as some beautiful beaches and generous armchair philosophy.  In the end, pure Esoterics and Orthodoxy won out. Poor Nietzsche was left behind without as much as a goodbye.

And then, on an August day in 2021, around noon, 12:12 to be exact, he entered into my world again with a crash of clarity.  Pure light and tears and deep, deep knowing. Every word meant something. Every syllable told me who he was. Every letter was like music to my soul.

This time, the love affair is deep. Nearly two years later it is lasting, or at least lingering.  It is not fizzling out or fading away.  It is inspiring and invigorating and life-affirming and meaningful and real.  Die Übermensch, he is striving, he is healing, he is strength.  Die Übermensch, he is haunting.

Destined, fated and forever, Nietzsche is molding me.  Via osmosis, he penetrates my walls and brings balance and justice to my sphere of existence. He is here...x1, x2, x3, x4ever?

Does this sound strange?  Do I sound crazy?  Is this folly?  Perhaps a crime?  Good. I must be on the right path then.  I see ample light and love and the highest heights before me. There is plenty to share. Ascending the mountain.  The train has left the station.  Hop on board if you dare.