Go Fast
"The more relaxed you are, the better you are at everything." - Bill Murray Ageism, Ego Death, Being Wrong, Running Out Of Time...All The Things Isn't it something, that my poor journals always get more of the sad than the happy. This post is for the record: I am feeling much better, more balanced and pretty darned happy now... until I went and met my neighbor. She's an artist and seemed kind and wonderful and she is living the soulful, successful artist's life that I have longed for the past 10 years and she reminds me, that I am not. Am I envious? Am I jealous? Am I just so disappointed that my own life didn't turn out that way no matter how much I wanted it, no matter how much work I put in, no matter how hard I tried? I was alone in my vision and you can't create a lifestyle from a vision this big alone. That's where my sadness lies, but I can't fully express it because in reality, I am still alone. This is where my deep, deep sadness lie...
